LOVE other women…
There seems to be a “move” underfoot about Body Positivity, don’t you think?
GREAT NEWS!!!!
But we have a WAYS to go.
It’s an online thing for the most part but I hope that will extend to REAL life, ourselves and others.
WHAT IT IS: not being ashamed of your body (and your looks) at whatever point in your health quest you’re at. Now.
And not putting your life on hold until ______________ in or with your body changes.
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The momentum around body acceptance and positivity is NOT exclusive to people (usually women) that are overweight.
[It doesn’t mean that if you’re obese, it is “healthy,” because generally speaking it’s not. Your risk of cancers, heart disease and advanced joint degeneration increases significantly, mamas! Even if you *FEEL* okay.]
It happens at the other end of the spectrum- anorexia, skinniness and everything in between.
Here’s why *I* think it’s important: though the message of accepting one’s body and looks is put out for all to see & absorb, a lot of the shaming is being done by women to other women- not by men.
Studies show that excessive social media use promotes depression and disturbs our health. It can, and does, reinforce crappy attitudes and insecurities we already might be feeling about how we look.
Body positivity is not: telling other women to stop “liking” or even following social media accounts of women who post bikini pics or otherwise small amounts of clothing. (Or saying the former and then posting your own scantily clad “fitness” pics on your account. I’ve seen this.)
Or that someone is “too old” to be wearing a certain outfit or style of dress.
Or critiquing (even if covertly) other women’s bodies by putting a disingenuous label on them. That is a form of a body shaming, my friends.
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Let me give you an example that I hear all the time online and off: the reason a woman has a flat belly is because if she hasn’t had a (biological) baby.
Well…That’s insensitive and not necessarily true! You don’t know if perhaps she struggles medically with issues like fertility. Even if she doesn’t… it’s not nice.
YES it is harder to trim that area if you’ve had a baby, or a few, or 5.
Or eat unhealthy the majority of the time.
But ^ neither is an absolute or direct correlation!
There are MANY more factors that play in to what size someone’s stomach is than just pregnancy or diet!
For instance there are certain inherited and acquired conditions or tendencies that can make looking lean difficult and even make the abdomen protrude: Down Syndrome, Liver Disease, PCOS, IBS, certain medications…
There are days (plenty of them) that my belly is FAR from flat and it’s not because I had kids, a lack of exercise or unhealthy diet. There are many women I know personally with bellies flatter than mine who have had 4 or even FIVE kids.
Let’s support ALL efforts to be HEALTHY and not make assumptions.
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Let’s encourage other women being brave enough to show up in public or post their pics online (minus Snapchat or other filters*) no matter their age, what condition their body is in or how they choose to drape it.
So… as women, we need to stop judging and shaming how other women look online and also off-line.
Hey, if you’re at the gym doing something healthy- I SUPPORT YOU. If you post a picture you’re particularly proud of, send me the link and I’ll “Like” the F outta it.
Love other women. It starts with us. In-person and online.
Love, T
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(* As a person with health and skin issues, I “get” the desire to airbrush or distort reality but…what/who is it helping?! Can we do away with all the excessive filters?! If you don’t like a picture, don’t post it. Like ZES Loretta Bates said in part “If you some of you went missing, they wouldn’t be able to FIND YOU based on your most recent photos!”)
p.s. Let’s talk soon about, as women, being BOLD and not shrinking, shirking, and being tiny, compact, slender…etc to the point where small and demure is prized and anything BIG is seen as a negative (including behavior). This mindset is forced upon us in the media and to a great extent we do it to each other.
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Any Questions?
